"Long Way Home"

For me, music is a big part of my life. I'm always listening to music, thinking about music, or just contemplating lyrics. This song, by Steven Curtis Chapman, really got me thinking. It is a long, and lonely, road sometimes. But God didn't tell us that this life would be easy or even popular. In fact, it's hard and you could be hated for believing. Think about back then; they were burned alive, stoned, crucified, boiled, and beheaded. And yet what amazes me most is that they refused to denounce their faith. They stood firm even though their wives, and chidren were tortured. As a woman, I think I would look at my husband, and say "Um.... Excuse me?! You go ahead but I'd like to be alive." That would be my fleshly response. The response that I would LOVE to have to would to stand there with him. I would love to have faith that strong and be that close to Jesus that I could be that strong. I think most of us have that fleshly response, but deep down we want to stand firm. In other places in the world this happens still today, but what do we have to fear? I mean a little teasing or ridicule? At worst, maybe we might be pushed around. I don't know about you, but this terrifies me. I have *nothing* to worry about and I still don't talk about Jesus. I am so scared of what people think about me that I am petrified ot show them Jesus? My excuse? I'm too shy.... Well I am about sick to death of being the quiet one! I want to be the type of girl that when people see me, they see Jesus. I want to be outspoken about the only Man who has died for me. Yes, you read that correctly. Jesus DIED for me, and for you. He loves you and I that much. That He, as God in the flesh, would be beaten and bruised beyond recognition as a human being, hung on a tree, and speared in the side to save you from Hell. I don't know about you, but I've been hearing that all my life and I'm still in awe. Of God sending His Son to DIE for my wretched existence. I read something in my Bible last night, and it just kinda stuck with me. Deuteronomy 21:25b :"... Because anyone who is hung on a tree is under God's curse." Let's recap for a moment, Jesus is God's SON right? Jesus, hung on a tree? Well by God's Word that means He was under God's curse. God turned his back on His Son! Now I know, as a daughter, I want my Daddy's approval and affection. I think it would hurt me beyond words to have my earthly father turn his back on me. But God did that so you and I could live with Him forever!
Something else I heard at some point really made me think. We've talked about Jesus dying, but you know.... He's coming back to get us! I have two points about this. 1, you remember when they buried Him? They wrapped Him up in burial clothes and placed a cloth over His face? When the disciples went in they saw that He had folded the napkin. The point of my showing you this seemingly insignifanct detail? Back then, if you were at the dinner table and you crumpled your napkin meant that you were finished; BUT if you folded it, it meant that you were coming back! Jesus is coming back to His believers to heaven!! That makes me want to shout! The second point is that we, as His followers, are His Bride. We are to be committed to Him as a loving bride waiting for her Husband to come get us. I read something the other day and I don't remember exactly how it went but I'm going to try anyway.. "Jesus doesn't want to date you, He wants to 'marry' you." I take it to mean this: Jesus wants a more meaningful relationship with you than "casual dating", which is basically what teens do today. Teens jump from person to person without the 'relationship' meaning anything at all other than fun. Now I am making a generalized statement and I don't mean the entire teenage population is like this. Myself, I've never had a boyfriend, but I have observed those around me. God wants to be your 'husband'. He is that committed to you and He wants the same from you and I.
I have had to come to terms recently that right now, I have to become committed to God only before I find a man. If I am to marry one day, I have to comfortable in my own skin and with God. I am working on it but I am slowly realizing that God is all I need. If I cannot be happy with just God, how in the world am I ever going to be happy with a human man, who will fail and disappoint me somethimes. I know good and well that I am going to fail and disappoint him. If we are looking for approval from human flesh, we will never be fullfilled. The only way to be truly fullfilled is by God. He created us, and when He did, He created this God sized hole in our hearts that can only be filled by... You guessed it! God. Anything else we throw in there: clothes, money, popularity, boyfriends/girlfriends, sports, religion... It is like a black hole. God is so big that those meaningless things gets sucked in and it becomes a never-ending search for "the one thing" that will fill it. Let me tell you, if you are looking in this earth for something other than God to fill that hole, you are looking in the wrong places.
Sorry for ranting, I just have alot to say! I love each of you. And so does my Jesus. I hope He is yours too.